By Haley Costen
Staff writer

This article is dedicated to the profiles that make you pass your phone to your friend with an eye roll. A lot of guys seem to need some serious help with their “about me”/profile pic game. And girls, if you find yourself getting seduced by any of these profiles, you need some guidance as well. So here are the seven profiles to avoid on Tinder:

1. The Non-Profile.
People who have profiles that say something like “insert funny comment here” or “something something something” annoy me more than anything. Is it really so difficult for you to say something original or creative about yourself that you have to use a lame cop out? Leaving your profile blank is better than that. You’re not being clever or cheeky, you’re being dull and lame.

2. The Comedian.
A lot of guys on Tinder think they’re really funny. I came across one profile that said “I probably won’t kidnap you,” and another that said “looking for my future ex- wife.” Yeah, because women love jokes like these. What else have you got, an Austin Powers impression? Not cute.

3. The Group Shot.
Obviously having friends is a desirable trait, but fun fact: it’s actually impossible to stand out when every single one of your pictures is a group shot with five other dudes. No one wants to sit around and try to guess if you’re the sexy one on the left or Quasimodo on the far right.

Even beyond the shallow aspect of it, what are you supposed to do if you decide to meet up with them–shout their name and hope for the best? Bottom line, most people aren’t going to try to figure out who you are when they have hundreds of other people at their fingertips.

4. Ron Burgundy
I love “Anchorman.” Like, I love “Anchorman.” And I’m not just naming random things and saying that I love them. And guys on Tinder really do too. I’m not sure if it’s because I’m set up with people who also like “Anchorman” on Facebook, but it’s honestly a miracle if I’m not faced with at least a few dudes every week whose “about me” consists solely of a quote from the movie.

Yeah, yeah. I get it. You have many leather-bound books and your apartment smells of rich mahogany. Oh you love lamp? SO DOES EVERY OTHER GUY ON TINDER. It was funny maybe the first three or four times. Quote another movie, guys. Or just say you live in Boston and play hockey or something. I don’t care.

5. The Guy With the Girlfriend
If you’re on a social media app to meet women, why do you have pictures of you cozying up with a woman on your profile? Maybe one picture with a girl is acceptable–she could be a friend or sister, or a weird second cousin or something. But if all of a guy’s photos are with one girl, he clearly has some issues he needs to clear up with her since he’s using a mutual photo of theirs to pick up other women.

6. The Nudist
A lot of guys think it’s cool to have pictures of them in various states of nudity. It’s not. No one wants to see that! Even if you’re on Tinder to hook up, no one is going to look at your naked form and instantly want to message you. Contrary to popular belief, girls don’t see naked man parts and instantly get turned on. (This isn’t just Tinder advice, people). Plus, Tinder takes photos from Facebook, why do you have nudes on Facebook?

7. The Invisible Man
If you don’t have a picture of yourself on your profile, no one is going to want to talk to you. It’s shady. It’s way better to have a bunch of unflattering photos of yourself than to have nothing, or worse a picture from a TV show or something. Besides, when I see someone who has something like an anime character or a piece of pizza as their profile picture, I assume they’re ugly or lack confidence. Wouldn’t you rather put yourself out there so if someone does finds you attractive they can actually see you?

Also, sorry to male readers. I’m sure women do a lot of stupid things on Tinder, but I don’t see it because I only see men. Not that I know anything about female profiles faux pas because mine’s awesome…totally kidding. (But not really).