By Kaydee Donohoo

Staff Writer

This summer started out great for Sander’s supporters. There were many more primaries left, California among them. We had done the math and knew the numbers were steep, but knew we still had a chance.

There were those of us who thought it was over after California, and some who held their breath for the recounting though people jeered at us.

Then there was the fact that Bernie still hadn’t technically dropped out, and then his name was put into the role call vote. There were all of the Hillary scandals that were surely going to get her sooner or later.

Now there are the rumors that Hillary’s pneumonia is a symptom of a larger problem. A lot are easily dismissible conspiracy theories, but we still see the headlines hinting that Democrats will hold a secret meeting to switch Hillary with Bernie.

Wait hold on. Yes, I’m sure there is a remote possibility of Hillary’s health failing enough for her to drop out. Sure, I guess there is even the slightest possibility that the DNC would put in Bernie over Tim Kaine, or Joe Biden, or some other name.

I guess all of that is possible, but we have to continue to prepare for the version of the world where things happen like they are expected to. I cannot go down this path again, emotionally or mentally. I still haven’t fully processed my grief for the Sanders campaign.

Just like a death, or a divorce you cannot process your grief if you don’t accept that what you’re grieving is gone.

If I see that Bernie is the new DNC nominee, I will be happier than I’ve ever been in my entire life. Picturing this though, is too painful to do when it is so unlikely to happen.

I’ve been mentally preparing for Bernie to loose since the first Super Tuesday. Then I immediately unprepared when I saw more sources with less skewed results. This happened again and again.

At some point we have to let go and heal. Because before I can process the end of Bernie’s campaign, all emotions are less processed. Slowly we need the colors to come back into our worlds. It’s what Bernie wants for us. He doesn’t want us to loose our newfound political passion. He wants us to fight because this campaign was never about him. We never believed him before, but we have to now. First we have to grieve, but then we’ll continue to fight.